Who Says You Can’t Get a Good Workout from Painting?



The Fantasy



I always have a list of projects to work on while I’m behind the corncob curtain.  Painting has always been on the list and during the past couple years I painted the two-car garage (including ceiling) as well as every other room in the house, except one.  Until this year, I always thought painting was a pretty easy task.  OK, I will admit, the two-car garage kicked my butt last year.  This year, I’m going on record by saying that baseboards, door/window trims, and closets replace the garage as the all-time worst paint jobs.   

It’s a little embarrassing to admit, but I bought the paint for the baseboards/trims back in early September and I’m still painting.  However, painting trim hasn’t been a job that I do on a daily basis; and in fact, I have been taking breaks as long as a week to work on other projects.  No, really! As with most projects, the initial spurt of enthusiasm quickly waned after I finished the “quick wins”.  These included baseboard areas where I didn’t have to move any furniture or rooms without any windows.  Yeah, I was feeling pretty good about my progress, until I faced:  THE RAILING!! 

Separating our dining room and family room is a railing which functions to keep people from tumbling into the family room.  The railing itself wasn’t too bad, but on either end of this structure are posts which are bordered by off-white paint.  Because the posts are patterned, masking the off-white areas or using putty knives weren’t viable options.  Here’s where the job became a pain in the butt.  I started with a one-inch brush but found that too much caffeine or an unsteady hand, resulted in grey paint in off-white edging.  Back to “Home Desperate”, I bought a set of artist’s brushes and Michaelangelina here was now painting off-white borders and the posts with a brush the size Seurat must have used.  The only good news is that at least I wasn’t suspended from a ceiling while doing this.  Yikes, I just had a flashback to the garage ceiling and the painting dripping on my face!   

Continuing with trim painting, I discovered I had more flexibility than I thought possible while scooting along the floor, paintbrush in one hand, putty knife in the other.  However, after about an hour, I felt like a human pretzel and needed a crack-a-practor or a hot tub.  Eventually, I found it was easier to work on baseboards, then get on the ladder and work on doorframes.  Moving furniture around added to the fun and I was glad that two rooms are empty of furniture, although one was loaded with books (i.e. inventory).  As of this writing, I still have part of the master bedroom and (gulp) the dreaded book room.   OK the latter could get us an invite on an episode of “Hoarders, Buried Alive”. 



The Reality



In true avoidance mode since October, I decided to change paint and work on the closets, figuring this would be easier.  Ha!  As of this writing, I’ve finished three and have two left.  I’ve decided that painting closets is like some masochistic game of Twister but played while standing on a ladder.   I’ve also discovered that my head fits in pretty tight places.  Squints here has been exercising her eyes too finding it challenging to check on the paint coverage, especially in low light spaces.  I’ve also discovered that white paint also doubles as mousse and my t-shirt is starting to resemble a rainbow on crack.  I’ve also been expanding my vocabulary with new words/phrases suitable for urbandictionary.com.   Ah, all these unforeseen opportunities.